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5 Things...

...we'd like to see change before the world ends. This sh*t is serious.

Don’t worry too much, it’s really only speculation. But then a whole ancient civilization can’t be wrong, can they?

Well yes, possibly, though we’ll have to wait until the beginning of next year to see if the Mayan’s were incorrect with their prediction that the world would end in 2012, rather than just getting the specific date in the calendar wrong. This means there is, of course, a marginal chance they were spot on, which made us think about all that’s wrong and now may not be righted in our world.

With issues such as piracy and the horrors of bad wardrobes on the mind we got to compiling this list of things that should happen in the realm of clubs so we can fully enjoy our last days on Earth. If those in control take heed then rest assured- things are going to get far better before the worst happens.

1. More dancing in clubs

Slowly moving from foot to foot is not really the same as dancing. Nor is Tweeting how good the night is, checking into a club via Facebook, or uploading poorly shot, inaudible video footage to YouTube. Less distractions and apathy, more sweat please- this is the end after all.

2. Appropriately dressed males

Call us old fashioned but we’re sure the lasting image of all that was should not be a man wearing an oddly-cut vest, nipples out, sporting skin tight three quarter length denims on his buff legs and leather slippers. Think on, it might be the last time we share a moment.

3. A licensing act to suit 2012

We don’t advocate piracy. We believe artists should get paid, and know music costs money to make. Regardless this debate has waged for so long it’s baffling a comprehensive solution has not been found yet. So, here’s hoping knowledge of humanity’s doom will spur things on, and if the Mayans were wrong it will come in handy for the future too.

4. Less new music

How many records, CDs, and MP3s do you own but have barely played? There’s more music than time these days, yet we don’t need so much, nor have we ever asked for it. To end an age of faster and more it would be nice to slow things down a little, so we can at least take a few days to truly appreciate the quality of what’s about to be lost forever.

5. The three-day weekend experiment

Ever heard the theory that people may actually be more productive if they were in work less, and therefore not as likely to become fatigued? Neither have we, but it certainly sounds worthy of investigation, not least if we’re on our way out as a species anyway. So let’s give it a go, and make double-club headers perfectly possible until the end of time.

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